LOVE IS HOW WE LIVE TOGETHER

(Preached on Sunday, January 28, 2007)

It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.                                                                                    -1 Corinthians 13:7

 

This passage from the Apostle Paul is an amazing description of the most powerful quality necessary for building true and long-lasting human community.  Yet, we have heard it so often, everywhere from weddings to funerals, that we immediately slip into a nodding autopilot mentality that confuses this description of love with society=s saccharine, romantic view.  Our approach to love as a building block for community has lost its powerful edge and we view this description as Anice, but highly impossible to achieve.@  We evaluate the possibilities for this type of behavior and attitude much like the anonymous author of the following description I discovered on the internet.

AIf you can start the day without caffeine or pep pills,

If you can be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,

If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles,

If you can eat the same food everyday and be grateful for it,

If you can understand when loved ones are too busy to give you time,

If you can overlook when people take things out on you when, through no fault of yours, something goes wrong,

If you can take criticism and blame without resentment,

If you can face the world without lies and deceit,

If you can conquer tension without medical help,

If you can relax without liquor,

If you can sleep without the aid of drugs,

Then you are probably the family dog.@

 

Paul wrote these words because he had a messed up church in Corinth where factions were tearing the community apart and people were pointing to their Agood works@ as though they were badges of honor indicating of their superior position in the community.  He attempts to show them that none of the problems they face as a community will be straightened out until they begin to show some love for each other C until they do some loving things for one another.

 

And he makes clear that while love is what we do, it is also all about how we do what we do.  Collecting food for food pantries and making sure homeless people have a place to stay -- as noble as those things are -- don=t matter much if we don=t show love for one another.  All the work done on the Board of Trustees to care for the church property doesn=t amount to much if we don=t love one another.  Sunday morning classes for children don=t matter if they don=t reflect God=s love.  The projects done by the women=s group are wonderful, but don=t mater much unless the women have abiding love for one another and the ones they serve.

 

Paul wants us to understand that love involves our attitude and our motivation.  If we love, in order to be loved, that is not love.  If we love, because we hope to receive something in return, that is not love. 

 

God keeps plugging away to bring that insight into our consciousness as human beings.  Listen to these words from the actress Kathryn Hepburn in her autobiography, Me.  AIt seems to me I discovered what >I love you= really means.  It means I put you and your interests and your comfort ahead of my own interests and my own comfort because I love you. ... Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get C only with what you are expecting to give C which is everything.  What you receive in return varies. ... If you are very lucky, you may be loved back.  That is delicious but it does not necessarily happen...@

God is still speaking.

 

Love makes sense of the activity of the church.  Love brings patience to our life together.  Such sacrificial love eradicates envy and arrogance.  Love keeps us from working against each other, and from being secretly happy when another person fails.  It is love that gives us the strength to forgive each other and start over again.  Love is what will keep us together against everything that could tear us apart. 

 

How can we begin to do this kind of love and gain this attitude of giving love with no thought of the return to us?

We begin by seeking this heart of love in prayer.  Paul understands that love is a gift from God.  It is not something we bring about by sheer force of our will.  It is something we seek in prayer, by drawing more and more closely to God and asking God, more and more, to guide our hearts, our actions, our lives.

 

Second, we can remember love is all about what we do in community, in living with other human beings, who are as imperfect, flawed, and fragile as are we.  Joshua Halbersam, author of Everyday Ethics offers some guidance:  AWhen you judge other people, remember one overriding axiom: >Everyone is having a hard time.  Everyone is insecure.  Everyone is hassled.  Everyone is tired C we all need more sleep.  Everyone wishes he had more courage, more money and better social skills.  Everyone wants more glamour in life, and we all desperately need more laughter.  Few can figure out how they ended up living the life they lead.  Don=t be misled by flippant talk C it=s a battle for everyone out there.  Give people a break.  It=s not easy doing life.@

 

Now we do pretty well with all his here at Christ Church.

Don=t misunderstand me and think I believe we are anywhere near as messed up as First Church Corinth.  We are an amazingly loving community.  But we are not perfect, either.  We have our struggles and we slip up from time to time.  We need to remind one another about the glue which holds us together, which is love, God=s love for us and, because of that love, our ability to love one another.

I know I need to be reminded from time to time.  I am a pretty loving guy C God actually seems to be doing a lot of loving of rather unlovable folk through me.  But, my wife will tell you, I have my moments when I am not only not lovable, but also, not very loving.  So, I think we need to remember what God=s love is truly all about; how God wants us to love; and just what God is capable of doing through us when we are truly living God=s love.

 

Before you nod your heads and think to yourselves, AThis is all well and good, but still impossible to do,@ let me share two stories from yesterday=s Miami Herald that suggest otherwise.  The first story was a front page story about the two coaches of the Super Bowl teams: Tony Dungy and Lovie Smith.  They are receiving even more attention than usual this year because both men are African-American and this is the first time any African-American has been head coach of a Super Bowl football team.  But yesterday=s story was not about the color of their skin, but about their character and their Christian values.  In the violent, rough and tumble world of professional football, the coaches are often as violent and abusive in their dealing with players as the players are on the field.  But not these two men.  Neither of them uses profanity or belittling speech toward their players and both make room for family and faith in their lives.  Let me share two quotes that speak volumes about them.  First, from Mikal Smith, Lovie Smith=s son who is himself an assistant coach in college: AThe thing about my dad and Coach Dungy that I=m most proud of is that they showed you can get to the Super Bowl by being soft-spoken and treating people with respect.  It doesn=t mean they=re soft people.  They=re both pillars of strength.@

The second comes from Jack Oliver, a pastor at Idlewild Baptist Church, who got to know Tony Dungy well during his Tampa Bay days: AIf I had to pick one word to describe Tony Dungy, I=d use Christ-like, and by that I mean he always thinks of others first and he lives what he believes.  He is such a humble man, despite his success and fame.  He=d come and sit in Bible class Wednesday nights just like anyone else.@  Both men have reached the pinnacle of their profession and they have done so with character and choosing to deal with people from hearts of divine love.